WHEN MY STOCKS COME TUMBLING DOWN
As recorded by Fields and Hall (Arthur Fields and Fred Hall), 1929.

I'm the chump you've heard about.
There's more like me without a doubt.
When stock reports are given out,
Oh, what a sucker!
My stocks come tumbling down.
My stocks come tumbling down.
I buy on margin, don't you see,
On a great big scale, but holy gee!
And then I lose my dough-re-mi.
My stocks come tumbling down.

I bought Tin Can at a dollar and a half
And Squeaky-Squawky Phonograph
At a price that would make a donkey laugh,
So I stood to make a million.
My stocks come tumbling down.
My stocks come tumbling down.
When I listened to the ticker tick,
I figured I could get rich quick,
But a bunch of bears were too darn slick.
My stocks come tumbling down.

My bootblack boy bought Gump preferred.
He told me not to say a word.
The price of Gump was so absurd,
So I bought a thousand shares.
My stocks come tumbling down.
My stocks come tumbling down.
I met my broker on the floor.
He said: "Go on and buy some more"
But I'm broker than I was before.
My stocks come tumbling down.

[Some patter omitted]

My laundry man bought Subway Jam
And a hundred shares of Chowder Clam.
His stock went up on Amsterdam,
So he bought himself some shoestrings.
His stock came tumbling down.
His stock came tumbling down.
He jumped right in the deep blue sea.
I was scared as I could be.
I looked to see if that guy was me.
His stocks came tumbling down.

The iceman gave me a tip on coal.
He told me not to tell a soul.
He said that coal was down the hole.
I thought that was a hot one.
That stock came tumbling down.
That stock came tumbling down.
There's one thing that I won't forget:
That stock was watered, you can bet,
And now I know that stock's all wet.
My stock's come tumbling down.