My transcription from the sheet music, which can be seen at The National Library of Australia or York University (Toronto). Spotify has recordings by Stanley Holloway (verse 1 and chorus), Ted Yorke (verses 1, 3, and chorus), and Harry Fragson (verses 1, 2, 3, and chorus).


HELLO! HELLO! WHO'S YOUR LADY FRIEND?
Words by Worton David and Bert Lee. Music by Harry Fragson, 1913.

1. Jeremiah Jones, a lady's man was he.
Ev'ry pretty girl he loved to spoon,
Till he found a wife and down beside the sea,
Went to Margate* for the honeymoon,
But when he strolled along the promenade
With his little wife just newly wed,
He got an awful scare when someone strolling there
Came up to him and winked and said:

CHORUS: Hello! Hello! Who's your lady friend?
Who's the little girlie by your side?
I've seen you
With a girl or two.
Oh! Oh! Oh! I am surprised at you.
Hello! Hello! Stop your little games.
Don't you think your ways you ought to mend?
It isn't the girl I saw you with at Brighton.**
Who, who, who's your lady friend?

2. Jeremiah took his wife's mamma one night
Round to see a moving picture show.
There upon the screen a picture came in sight.
Jeremiah cried, "We'd better go."
For on that picture there was Jeremiah
With a pretty girl upon his knee.
Ma cried, "What does it mean?"
Then pointing to the screen
The people yelled at Jones with glee—

3. Jeremiah now has settled down in life,
Said goodbye to frills and furbelows,
Never thinks of girls except his darling wife,
Always takes her everywhere he goes.
By Jove, why there he is! you naughty boy
With a lady too, you're rather free.
Of course you'll stake your life
The lady is your wife
But tell me on the strict Q. T.—

4. Christmas pantomimes were Jones's chief delight.
Once he madly loved the Fairy Queen.
There behind the scenes, he spooned with her one night.
Someone for a lark pulled up the scenes,
And there was poor old Jones upon the stage
With his arm around the lady fair.
The house began to roar
From gall'ry down to floor
Then ev'rybody shouted there—

* The Australian version of this song substitutes "Manly."
** There are variations of this line in Fragson's recording, but I couldn't completely understand them. I believe they began: "It isn't the girl you kissed at...." and "It isn't the girl you brought to...."