Most people who oppose gay marriage aren't hateful about it - they're just uncomfortable, and maybe they don't know anybody who's gay and they're a bit afraid. It they are dealt with gently and nonaggressively

Why yes, let's be gentle and non-aggressive to bigots. Why not? After all, the victims of their bigotry, going backs many hundreds of years, were treated so gently and non-aggressively, weren't they?