It's great news that your parcel has arrived so early, but I had asked the delivery dragon to ensure that you received it 'just in time'. You just can't get the staff, can you?

We will be having a fairly quiet traditional Christmas this year. Some of our family are away doing other things, so there will be less of us around the table. Not a BBQ or sandcastle in sight and there may even be some snow.

You mentioned that you have an idea who I am, but that I might have moved recently. Quite unlikely, I assure you, as I find that this North Pole residence is perfectly habitable, though not to everyone's taste.

Hopefully you will find your gift to be suitable, but beware, if you are bad or you open it before the big day it will turn into a lump of polish coal. Compliments of the season to you and yours.