The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #28685   Message #358243
Posted By: Little Hawk
16-Dec-00 - 10:46 AM
Thread Name: BS: Libido in HIGH gear - SO's in LOW gear
Subject: RE: BS: Libido in HIGH gear - SO's in LOW gear
GFOR - Sounds like maybe your guy feels disempowered in some way (or ways), and that can really reduce libido. You say he used to complain about money problems...well, yeah, money problems can certainly sap a person's self-confidence and that can reduce their zest for a lot of things. The smoking and the beer drinking definitely do not help one bit, as they both are a drag on the whole system...as is any addiction. TV watching is also a curse on healthy relationships as far as I'm concerned. I haven't owned a TV ever, and neither (thank God!) has my SO. We both agree that life is way better without sitting glued to the idiot box.

The real question, I guess, is...is your man feeling this lack of enthusiasm because of outer factors (like money, etc.) or is it just a problem basic to his character? If so, a solution is not going to be easy to find.

Matt R - Don't feel too bad. I went PAST 22 without once having a lover...I ain't gonna tell you just HOW long I had to wait (after all, I've got a reputation to maintain in this town...ha! ha!), but it was all worthwhile in the end. When things don't come so easy you sure appreciate them later when they finally do! Hang in there....your ship will come in. Oh, it helps not to be too desperate...desperation scares people off, so don't sweat it.

As for the big football heroes who were getting all the girls when I was in high school...most of them now have big stomachs and bald heads and mortgages, and they look 15 to 20 years older than me, and I'm free as a bird. So, ha, ha, ha...! Patience pays off in the end.

- LH