Lyr. Add: ROOT, HOG OR DIE (Arizona)
Sung by Riley Neal

I was born in Indiana, a state you all know well,
But I moved to Arizona, that country hot as hell;
I had a notion in my head, cowpunching I would try,
Never thinking what I'd do about my root, hog or die.
2
I got a job upon a ranch, one hundred miles away,
Up north from old Phoenix, and there I had to stay,
Until the next spring came around, and then we had to go
And drive those steers to market, on a journey long and slow.
3
When we got to Phoenix, and the cattle were all sold,
The cowboys spread out over town to buy themselves some clothes;
We got our shaves and baths, and then struck out to try
To see if we could find release for out root, hog or die.
4
I met a fair young maiden; her glances were so sly
That I thought I'd make a try for my root, hog or die;
She said, "Go get some lemons and some good old rock and rye,
And then I'll see what I can do for your root, hog or die."
5
We went up to her room, and my prick it quickly rose,
Before I got it in the bitch, I shot it all over her clothes;
I took her in my arms, "Now, baby, don't you cry,
I'll get another hard on, and we'll root, hog or die."
6
About nine days from this date, my prick began to swell;
If cursing would have sent the bitch, she would have surely been in Hell;
When I went to piss, my asshole was on fire,
And I had a dozen shankers on my root, hog or die.
7
I went to see a doctor, saying, "Docror, I am sick."
The first damn thing he said to me was "Let me see your prick."
He pulled it out and twisted it, my God, he made me cry.
He says, " You've got a case of root, hog or die."
8
He gave to me some medicine, the stuff it stank like hell,
He says, "If you'll only take it, it will surely make you well."
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9
For six long weeks I taken it- the bastard how he lied!
That's how I lost the head off my root, hog or die;
Come all you young punchers and listen to me,
Don't be so quick to stick your prick in everything you see.
10
For if you do you'll surely rue, and you will be like I,
You'll have to go to the hot springs with your root, hog or die;
The way had been long and weary, that's why I was so quick to try;
That's why I lost the head off my root, hog or die.

Lomax (Mss.), Folder 2E397 (bawdy variant), University of Texas.

Pp. 140-142; with musical score.
Guy Logsdon, 1989, ""The Whorehouse Bells Were Ringing" and other songs cowboys sing;" University of Illinois Press.