Murray,

We Irish can empathize. For, like whiskey, it was us that gave you the long bellclapper gene. You highlanders, being of Irish descent, and the resulting watering down of the long bellclapper gene due to the presence of the indigenous Picti, Aberdeen cattle and various and sundry sheep, have had to switch from the traditional breeches of our people (which covered our bellclappers all the way to the ankle) to the shorter kilt. After all, given your frugal natures, there is no sense wasting material all the way to the ankles when thigh length will do. We understand this, and further can empathize with the need for a bit of modesty and not to feel used. That is why we stay with breeches. They take a sense of deliberate action on our part, so our genetic seed bank is not spent at the whim of every warm place that desires it. As you know, we have a great sense of propriety.............LOL.

All the best,

Mick