I was feeling very VERY down today, more than any time since Tom died -- not enough sleep, beleaguered by the weather and the mounds of snow, many many (oppressively many) other contributing factors. Basically Just. Too. Much.

So I did the major thing that need to be done -- dragged the ladder into the bathroom and secured the trim piece above the shelves to keep the flying squirrel out of the house (and Rufus from scattering everything on the shelves around the bathroom in a search and destroy mission).

Then I turned off the phone and took a nap. That helped. That really helped. Woke up feeling much more able to cope.

Turned the phone back on and immediately got a call from THE BEST PERSON for me to talk to right now...as I was probably the best person for another friend to talk to late last night.

Equilibrium has been more or less restored. Glass of wine and a dinner of something other than cabbage soup almost consumed.

Also made the decision NOT to make a decision on Medicare...just take what the government offers and defer a decision on Advantage, Supplemental, etc. until later. Still have to call ServiceLink (NH's elder services organization) for advice on ACA (which I'll only need til June) and Medicare Part D...but not today.

One of the other contributing factors to my mood today was a year ago yesterday Tom was in the ICU sedated and on a vent. Because of predicted bad weather, I spent the night in an uncomfortable chair listening to him breathe and trying to sleep. I went home the next morning with what I thought was a cough from the dry air in the ICU, but after a nap, realized it was a full blown cold and was sick as a dog for a couple days (while Tom was sedated and on a vent and wasn't even aware I wasn't there). Pretty much the beginning of the downhill slide in Tom's health...

Sometimes grieving sucks, too.

Linn