Cold, lonely, down fiddler wanders in. "This a pub?"
"Need music, need cheer, need beer." Need a sugar dog lap. Manger would do in a pinch, I suppose, but not enough dog hair. Could somebody play something I haven't heard a million billion times before? Like Coventry Carol? Fiddler sez--"Next year better by damn be better..."

Is that a Holly Berry jello pit I see? And whose tattered knickers are those on the flagpole out front? Mrs. Santa's? NO? Oh, she doesn't come here anymore, does she? Somebodies musta kicked the evergreen off her tree, huh? Too bad.

(feeling cranky and not too charitable tonight)