My older cousin sang it to us when she babysat!

I found an old stocking and filled it with lead.
I hit an old lady, right over the head.

A copper came over and asked me my name.
I replied nicely, with a bicycle chain.

The judge said sit down son and wipe away your tears
'cause you're going to borstal for 2 or 3 years.

My mother she fainted, my sister she fell
As they led me down the steps, to the cell they call hell.

There's bars on the windows, there's bars on the doors.
Even the piss pots are screwed to the floors.

I counted the moonbeams, I counted the stars.
I counted 10,000, behind borstal bars.

So kiss me my darling and say you'll be mine.
'cause 3 years in borstal is a fucking long time.