Some years ago I was travelling on a train for a journey of around 3 hours. I was sitting in a window seat, with a large, burly man sat next to me in the aisle street. Across the aisle from him was a man who talked incessantly on his mobile. He talked, and he talked, and he talked. Irritation and boredom from all around him.

Eventually he stopped talking and the mobile lay on the table in front of him.

It rang.

He was about to pick it up when my neighbour leaned over, placed a large, hairy paw over the phone and said, "If you answer that, I'll ram it down your throat."

End of conversation. The phone was switched off and put away for the rest of the journey.