Gimme in the Name of the Lord

Now this is the story of the Reverend Joe, who got the holy call
to memorize the gospel and preach to one and all.
But he didn't look good in sackcloth, wasn't fond of poverty,
so he bought a five hundred dollar suit
and did his preaching on TV, crying

(chorus) Gimme, gimme, gimme in the name of the Lord and his apostles twelve
we'll heal the sick and preach the word and keep a little for ourselves

Well Joe was so successful, telling folks about wrong and right
He went in syndication, and then on the satellite
Even the president counted Joe amongst his favored few
Cause he told him God was on his side no matter what he'd do, crying (chorus)

Now the Lord he rode a donkey, walked barefoot by the sea
Joe he rides in a jumbo jet with a stereo color TV
The Lord preached on the mountain, under a sky of blue
Joe built a 20 million dollar church, cause he said God told him to, crying(chorus)

Now Joe believed the Bible could never, ever lie,
Especially the part that said, "Be fruitful and multiply"
So he always wore his long white robe when preaching up a storm
Cause he knew the women couldn't resist a man in uniform, crying (chorus)

The Lord he finally did speak to Joe, said "I heard you've been using my name
I better see some of the money go to the sick and the poor and the lame"
So he went on the air with a special appeal preaching the same old line
Said "I'll get money for them poor folks, but it sure ain't gonna be mine, crying (chorus)

But Joe got caught with his hand in the till, and his pants on the office chair
And he finally knew what it really meant to be standing in the need of prayer
Now he's repenting in his mansion, down by the Palm Springs sands
Playing poker with Dick Nixon, making second coming plans, and singing (chorus)

When good folks gather in His name, two or three or four or more
They can sing a hymn and pass the plate and we all know what it's for
But when some fella far away comes preaching on your TV
Remember prayer begins at home and so does charity, when he says (chorus)


words and music by Bill Steele, 1987, Loose Lid Music...from Sing Out Vol 36 (3), Nov/Dec 91, Jan 92
with apologies to Joe Offer....*wink*...hg