Ironically, most of mine would be excellent at having a pop at Mike. I assumed Apple put them in the latest iOS8 for my personal benefit.

On the off chance he asks a young person to turn his computer on for him, here's a message just for him.

🙈🙉🙊o💩💩l👴👴👴d🙀😹😹😾👹g😎😎😎i😜😜t