Those "invisible inter-dimensional cracks that open up and swallow things" --

-- we call them Black Holes in our house. 'Where the hell is such and such?' Emma will ask. 'Must have gone down the Black Hole,' I will reply.

The other thing, with my first wife Valerie, was 'a safe place'. "I can't find such and such," she used to say, "and I know I put it in a safe place." "No wonder you can't find it," I would respond. So now an alternative reply to, "Where can the wotsit be?", might be, "You put it in a safe place, of course."

≈M≈