Jason, how about a song from Australia's late lamented John Dengate?   

Rectal Bleeding Calypso

John wrote many great songs, including songs about his family & the Australian political situation, but 'Solar Melanoma Blues' fits your topic & unfortunately I can't find the words anywhere. It's referred to in several posts on Mudcat & elsewhere on the net, & somehow it missed being published in his 3 books, & is not on his 3 CDs.

I hope to have the words tomorrow

sandra