Mrs Musket says "put Masterchef on." Ok, I say, about to sit there bored. She then "watches" Masterchef whilst playing solitaire or Angry Birds on her iPad whilst having a conversation with me thus; "I thought you were staying in tonight? Don't you like Masterchef? Take your bloody key with you then and be quiet when you get back."

Multi tasking isn't just a woman thing. When I wake up, I can rub my eyes, stretch and scratch my bollocks simultaneously. I can also sing and give the evil eye treatment to readers......