The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #156536   Message #3690031
Posted By: ranger1
26-Feb-15 - 02:26 PM
Thread Name: BS: Maddening phone call surveys
Subject: RE: BS: Maddening phone call surveys
My friend Van likes to keep them going on and on forever, especially the Microsoft scam callers. Here's one of his conversations:

"I just had another illuminating conversation with those fun guys at "Windows Technical Assistance" who want me to give them remote access to my computer! This is the fourth time we discussed my computer and I can't tell you how nice it is to know these people are so concerned about it.
"Hello, this is Mike," came the possibly Indian accent over the phone.
"Hi Mike, how are you?"
"I am fine, thank you very much." Then Mike began to tell me about all the terrible things they have detected regarding my computer. "Are you the main user of the computer?" he asked.
"I am in Maine, yes."
"That is good, now –"
"Are you in Maine?"
"Excuse me?"
"Are you in Maine?"
He began to tell me what was wrong with my computer again.
I said: "Because if you are in Maine, you and I should get together for a cup of coffee and chew the fat."
"Excuse me?"
"It's been too long. Don't you think it's been too long?"
"What has been too long?"
"Since you and I had coffee and chewed the fat."
There was a pause on the other end. "I don't believe that has ever happened."
"Well," said I, somewhat deflated. "I'm sorry I made so little impression on you. What color is your shirt today?"
"What color is my shirt?"
"That is why I called. I called to find out what color your shirt is."
"No, sir, I called you about your computer."
"Is this Alan?"
"No, this is Mike."
"Well, sure, you said that. I was thinking of you earlier today. I thought, I wonder what color Mike's shirt is?"
"Sir, I believe there is some error here."
"Yes, in my computer."
Now the slightest sense of hope sounded in his voice. "Yes, the errors in your computer."
"Is Alan there?"
"Is Alan there? What color is his shirt?"
"I will transfer you to Alan."
"Oh, that'd be wonderful. Maybe the three of us can have coffee sometime."
Somehow, our connection was broken.
I never did get around to asking him his hat size. Nice guy, though."