A different song on the same topic. I found this on Spotify.


THE COLONOSCOPY SONG
As sung by Stu Moss on "Look at Me" (2005).

I don't like getting older; it doesn't seem quite fair.
Your memory fades, you need a hearing aid, and you lose your hair.
The young men get the women, but I don't give a damn,
'Cause there's something I get more often than any younger man:

A colonoscopy, a colonoscopy.
It stirs such feelings so deep inside of me,
And for a modest fee,
A colonoscopy
Opened up a whole new world for me.

A tiny TV camera four feet inside of me,
Some Valium, and a very large sum, and some Vaseline.
I don't have much courage; I know myself, no doubt,
But my gastroenterologist knows me inside out.

A colonoscopy, a colonoscopy—
I find I'm dreamin' of
Someone with rubber gloves—
Not a sigmoidoscopy,
'Cause a sigmoidoscopy
Is just a semicolonoscopy.
And I saw the whole thing on TV,
And it opened up a whole new world,
It opened up a whole new world,
It opened up a whole new world for me.