My Dad used to sing this to me:

Oh the cat flew up the chimney, The Dog he tore about
He jumped in baby's cradle and nearly knocked him out
Oh mother sort protection behind the carving knife
When the old man came home sober for the first time in his life

You should have seen him there, a sight I do declare
Oh so frisky drunk on whiskey driving the servants spare
Oh mother sort protection behind the carving knife
When the old man came home sober for the first time in his life