My technique was to talk to them as people, and to make sure they understood I expected the same consideration in return.
Treating them as 'kids' made them behave that way - and it's important to understand that they expect you to listen to them.
My Education Tutor at college was really down to earth. He said the secret of successful teaching is 'Start from where the pupil is at...'!!
Books aren't much use. Either you develop your own 'feel' for it, guided by helpful, experienced colleagues - make sure you listen to them, too! - or you must acknowledge your shortcomings and try to work within your limits.