The version I (nearly) recall from Army days in the 60s goes

On the twelfth day of Christmas I took to bed with me
Twelve tail-less tomcats (tailors' tomcats?)
Eleven luscious lesbians
Ten torn-off testicles
Nine gnawn-off nipples
Eight useless eunuchs
Seven ????
Six pure-white virgins
Five choir boys (always sung falsetto)
Four shithouse doors
Three poxy whores
Two Girl Guides
And my Lord Montagu of Beaulieu.