Aargh, Boycott. A member of that small but detestable band of "professional Yorkshiremen" along with Eddie Waring, Fred Trueman, Paul Daniels (bless 'im) and Parky. I mean, bloody Parky. I have to leave the room when he comes on. It's just a pity that Graham Norton isn't a tyke because I have to leave the room when he comes on too. Maybe he can be an honorary professional Yorkshireman. And John Prescott. Eek. How are these people permitted to infest a county that contains the beautiful Dales!

Eddie Waring is a bum
Eddie Waring is a bum
Ee aye addie Eddie Waring is a bum