The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #159633 Message #3784251
Posted By: keberoxu
08-Apr-16 - 02:06 PM
Thread Name: BS: Triage, or 'where am I'
Subject: RE: BS: Triage, or 'where am I'
Thankfully there are several "Breeze Shooting" threads where members are thoroughly enjoying their ongoing disagreements, and I can stay out of their way and let them do so without me.
It's just that too often, any "ongoing disagreement" reminds me of the old pattern of fixed [I said "decided"] positions being repeated and nobody listening. Said another way: there is "listening to," and there is "listening for." I am certain Wysiwyg is well acquainted with the distinction, judging from her posts. It is very convenient and expedient to "listen for." There, one listens for words from others as a cue to launch into one's fixed statements, and to repeat them emphatically. "Listening to" can be a real inconvenience because one cannot "listen to" without making oneself receptive. In my experience, receptivity is NOT passive, however quiet it appears: I find it is really hard work to accept and receive from a place of tranquillity. For me, to let somebody else in, to allow them time and space, to pay attention to them and to stay vigilant and alert to what they communicate, and to stay tranquil and calm, takes concentrated, sustained effort and it is a lot more difficult than it looks.