"Red Rose teabags fit New Brunswick like a glove on a cold hand, that it's considered the best tea up that-a-way." Red Rose? DISHWATER! Surely you are just yankin' my chain? Red Rose? From Uppity Canada? Red Rose? Buddy, you are just short of gettin' a letter sent to your sorry ass.

King Cole Orange Pekoe outta Sussex, New Brunswick, preferably boiled in one a them old tomatoe juice cans what we hangs upside downy on every second fir tree up country fer the next fellah ta use. Filled with bog water and boiled over an open fire. Served with oatmeal cookies like Dad used ta make.

Red Rose tea in New Brunswick? JAYSUS H. CHRIST! How DARE you, sir!!!

Next thing, you'll be telling me them there Tetley Elves aren't on the endangered species list in NB. Well, they are on accounta we step on the little fuckers in the Name of the King. Long live King Cole!