'Tis a pity young sir. If Mondays fit in with your memsahib's plans, then don't forget it's Donny Strummers tonight. The bad news is that Bob Chiswick will be late, the sad news is that he asked yours truly to run it till he gets there.

Raining in Van Diemens Land eh? We know a song about that, don't we children?

Thanks to seventeen million disturbed xenophobes, your £89.60 won't get as many pie floaters as you thought..,,   Sorry, OUR £89.60. I'm still waiting for the party.