Inadequate, Spaw, and what was number 2 in the Woman one?

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A SINGLE WOMAN WHO ISN'T CONCERNED WITH STEREOTYPES OR IS JUST A SLOB, NOT THAT I'M TALKING ABOUT MYSELF HERE, MIND YOU:
1. Take off clothing and put it neatly on the pile already on the bathroom floor.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror. Lift boobs up to check whether or not you still have a waist.
4. Get in the shower. Screw around with the hot and cold taps until you get the temperature perfect.
5. Wash your hair with cheap shampoo with built-in conditioner.
6. Wonder why the water isn't draining and pick out a wad of tub-hair. Wonder if that's where the Star Trek guys got the idea for tribbles.
7. Consider using the expensive, fancy crap to wash your face after you get out of the shower, then give up and use the soap.
8. Shave armpits and realise you were going to replace the razor a couple of months ago.
9 Consider shaving legs, but remember you don't have any Drano.
10. Consider shaving bikini area. Laugh hysterically at the thought of wearing a bikini.
11. Turn off shower.
12. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap towel so the water drips out the end onto the floor.
13. Consider looking at ass in mirror and decide you've had enough punishment.
14. Leave bathroom wearing ratty but warm dressing gown and towel on head.
15. Go get another cup of coffee and think about getting dressed.