AllanC - an outhouse fire? This has all the indications of a song challenge.
Lil Neo - I don't do windows or cut wood. I'll handle the hotdog concession. In fact, screw that! I want to ride in the rescue helicopter. I flew in the helicopter over Niagara Falls the day before it crashed. Thst should be qualification enough.

Another fact:
I took flying lessons out of Midway Airport in Chicago until I was almost rear ended by an American Airlines jet. Could probably still fly one (Single engine Cessna) if I had to.