"I grew up in the west country.. absolutely no inspiring football teams anywhere for hundreds of miles."

Don't tell my mate that who played for Argyle in the '60s...

When I were a little lad up north I often went to Gigg Lane, home of Bury FC. They never made the first division as was, but they nearly got there one season. There was one twat who went every week and spent the whole match banging a big bass drum at the back of the terrace. You'd see some of the best football at those lower division games, quite a few hairy-arses in the teams admittedly, but the games were fast and open and the lads would NEVER have kissed each other after scoring goals. Gigg Lane always boasted a good pitch but in those days some of the pitches were like swamps in winter. You could hardly move in the goalmouths without wellies on at times. Me mum and dad still live just a ten-minute walk from "t'Gigg." Nowt wrong wi' any of it!