I spent 2 years in the Army, rising to the rank of 4-star General before returning to civilian life to train for the Olympics. I took the bronze medal in the shot put at the 1976 games, and moved up to capture the gold at the 1980 games. In 1982, I was elected to the House of Representatives, serving in that capacity for 12 years. Upon moving to Canada, I served as Prime Minister until retiring to write full time. In 1996, I received the Nobel Peace Prize, and in 1997 the National Book Award for my presidential biography, "Millard Fillmore: A Life?" In 1998 I entered the state fair and received the Pullet Surprise. For the last three years I have held the world light-heavyweight boxing title, have posed for Playfiddler magazine's centerfold, and I like to reheat dinners in my spare time.

-chanteyranger