Good work, keberoxu. Here is my continuation:

... was strung into the fiddle,
in order to appear more pleasant,
and even if they all shouted "Woe!"
he would not stop fiddling.

Thus they were tweaked and pinched,
cymballed and bowed,
and if
any poor fool would lose the beat,
the drummer would jump forth
to strike the drum roll,
and slough him tightly up his ears,
so that he may sense the right measure.

The emperor, delighted by this dance,
appointed the musicians
immediately, according to their performance,
to be titled Ludi-Ministri.
To the fiddler he assigned the Ministry of Justice,
to the cymbalist the Treasury,
to the drummer the Militia,
and let them continue the dance.

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Ludi-Ministri: a wordplay based on Latin "ludi magistri" (= elementary teacher)