MOTHER, WHAT'LL I DO NOW
As recorded by George Formby, 3-Apr-1938.

Mother, you give good advice; always you mean well.
Now I need it more than ever; I'm inside this cell.

I'm behind a prison wall.
The bed's so hard and much too small.
There's no pyjamas here at all.
Oh, mother, what'll I do now?
They told me they would treat me swell,
Tucked inside my little cell,
But up till now it's been like—.
Mother, what'll I do now?
We're parted from each other, and that's too bad.
You're my fav'rite mother, oh, the best I ever had.
Tonight I've got a date, you see,
But they won't let me have a key,
And the warders won't wait up for me.
Oh, mother, what'll I do now?

It's hard to pass the time away.
I'm in a dang'rous mood, I say.
I've smoked two cigarettes today.
Oh, mother, what'll I do now?
First I stand and then I sit,
Then I sit and stand a bit,
But I can't stand much more of it.
Oh, mother, what'll I do now?
We're parted from each other, and that's too bad.
You're my fav'rite mother, oh, the best I ever had.
I got such an awful shock!
I asked the time, for there's no clock,
And the warder said: "Six months, old cock."
Oh, mother, what'll I do now?

They called a lunch from soup to sweet,
But they forgot the fish and meat,
And since the soup, there's nowt to eat.
Oh, mother, what'll I do now?
I've had such a tummy ache!
All night long I've been awake.
Some castor oil they made me take.
Oh, mother, what'll I do now?
We're parted from each other, and that's too bad.
You're my fav'rite mother, oh, the best I ever had.
I've played Peter, Fly Away, Paul.
I've played tiddlywinks and all.
I've written rude words upon the wall.
Oh, mother, what'll I do now?