However, if the decision had been to remain then nothing would have changed. My children and children's children would have been free to work anywhere in Europe and we still would have been part of the biggest trading organisation in the world. There is no baseless optimism in that.

That was a major failing in the Remain campaign. It was based on the idea that the choice was between the changes that would occur if we left, and the lack of change if we remained. But there was never a promise of the status quo if we remained. EU was always going to be about ever closer union.
It may be that, without the UK holding things back, the ever closer union will progress more quickly, but it would have happened anyway.

It was never 'Change vs Status Quo' it was always going to be about who decided what change we wanted.