Today is Valentine's Day, and my dear husband, the DH, has composed the following, to the tune of "Git along, home, Cindy, Cindy."

An erg is either a sand-covered region, and a unit of work. He admits his meter is a little ragged, but so is the meter of the original.

Wish I was an erg,
Coverin' all the land.
Ever' time my sweetheart passed,
She'd scrunch her toes in my sand.

Wish I was a mountain,
Too out of breath to speak,
At a rendezvous with my sweetheart,
We'd come together at the peak.

Wish I wuz a lion,
Creepin' through the grass.
Ever' time my sweetheart passed,
I'd try to not harass.

Wish I was an airfoil,
slidin' through the air.
I'd give my sweetheart a little lift,
When climbin' up the stair.

Wish I was a dynamo,
Converting ergs to volts.
Ever' time my sweetheart spun me,
She'd get a couple jolts.

Wish I was a white dwarf,
Runnin' out of hydrogen.
One little touch from my sweetheart,
A supernova begins.

Wish I wuz an iceberg,
floatin' out to sea.
When she went to cool her cocktail,
She'd use a chunk of me.