A Russian one that's an eenie-weenie bit more relevant: An old man walks up to St Peter and says, "I just want to see my son, can't remember his name, but he's got nails through his hands and feet..." St Peter hurries back through the gate in ecstasy, shouting, "Jesus, Jesus, God Your Father has returned!" Out runs Jesus and embraces the old man, who cries, "Pinocchio!"