Since parodies are okay, I thought of one of my favorites - The Streets of Miami by Allan Sherman. I don't do it as much as I used to because it is rather dated (you have to know your audience!), and if I do I usually change "sixty dollars" to "thousand dollars" (one must adjust for inflation). Movie title references are in boldface; the tune is, of course, Streets of Laredo.

The Streets of Miami

As I wandered out on the streets of Miami,
I said to myself, this is some fancy town.
I called up mine partner and said, “Hello, Sammy;
“Go pack up your satchel and mosey on down.”

I got me a bunk in the old Roney Plaza,
With breakfast and dinner included, of course;
I caught forty winks on my private piazza,
Then I rented a pinto from Hertz Rent-a-Horse.

My partner flew down on a non-scheduled airline;
You never did see such a pale-looking man.
I recognized him from his receding hairline,
He recognized me from my beautiful tan.

‘Twas then that I heard fighting words from my partner.
He said, “Marvin, the Roney is no place to stay;
“I'm going to the Fontainebleau, partner, it’s mod’ner,
“And I’ll charge to the firm sixty dollars a day.”

I said to him, “Paleface, you hanker for trouble;
“With the company checkbook you’re quick on the draw.”
He smiled and said, “Stranger, for me that goes double,
“’Cause west of the Fontainebleau, I am the law!”

Next morning, the whole Lincoln Road was deserted,        
And somewhere a hi-fi was playing a tune;
’Cause everyone knew someone’s gonna be murdered,
In a Duel in the Sun at the stroke of High Noon.

I took careful aim with my trusty revolver;
The clock in the Fontainebleau struck twelve o’clock.
I shot, and Sam crumbled just like a piece Halvah,
And that’s what they called a Bad Day at Black Rock.

They came with a posse and took my six-gun away;
The crowd was too angry to leave me in jail.
The Sheriff said, “Outlaw, I’m gon’ let you run away,
“But don’t ever be seen south of Fort Lauderdale!”

So now I can never go back to Miami,
And New York is so cold that a person could die;
I’d be better off dead like my late partner Sammy,
‘Cause he’s in that big Fontainebleau in the sky!