I was drunk in charge of a shopping trolley once...

It was well past midnight, and the only way to get my completely sozzled girlfriend [now the mrs]
safely back from the city centre to our student hall of residence 4 or 5 miles away...

I'm fairly certain we stayed on the pavements...???


Back then, I was so skinny, less than 11 stone,
and could get pissed on just a few bottles of strong lager...

Duran Duran and Spandau Ballet were in the pop charts...