The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #30760   Message #396757
Posted By: Amos
12-Feb-01 - 08:32 PM
Thread Name: BS: American Bumper Stickers
Subject: RE: BS: American Bumper Stickers
Hey, look at it this way: if your fellow humans are disinclined to talk to YOU, what the hell makes you think they want to hear from your CAR???

But it is true that a funny little cultural back-eddy has evolved -- a behaviour learned, no doubt from the crudescence that passes for great minds on Madison Avenue -- involving using your car as a medium for communicating. After all, they use trucks to promote groceries and plumbing services.

Some bumper stickers I think I would rather see, in place of the current lot:

STRIVE FOR EXCELLENCE.
TOLERATE ERROR.
NOTHING SUCKS ­
IT'S ALL PRESSURE
MOLECULES HAVE RIGHTS, TOO
I'M THE FATHER OF
A PREGNANT PAUSE
DON'T BE THAT WAY!
COMMUNICATE!
REALITY IS DEPENDING ON YOU!
IT ALL STARTS RIGHT NOW!
HELP STOP CONTINENTAL DRIFT!
JUST BECAUSE YOU WERE BORN IN A BLACK HOLE DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO ACT LIKE ONE!
JUST BECAUSE YOU LEARNED THAT LESSON THE HARD WAY DOESN'T MEAN IT'S TRUE!!
GOD FOOLS AROUND
DON'T QUIT NOW ­YOU MAY BE AHEAD WITHOUT KNOWING IT!
WHEN YOU GET TIRED OF BEING WALKED ON ­TRY GETTING UP OFF THE FLOOR!
Life is DESPOTISM
Tempered by SLOPPINESS
NOTHING SUCKS ­IT'S ALL PRESSURE
COMMIT RANDOM KINDNESS AND SENSELESS ACTS OF BEAUTY
IF I WERE GOD AT LEAST I WOULD SHOW UP FOR WORK
PRODUCTION, PRIDE, AND A BETTER HUMAN RACE
-DO IT RIGHT OR GO BACK TO BED
-THE HARDER YOU WORK, THE LUCKIER YOU GET
-MAKE IT BETTER NOW
HUMANS NEED EACH OTHER
-WELCOME TO THE ONLY SPECIES THAT CRITICIZES ITSELF ­AND DOES
IT BADLY!
-MY OTHER LIFETIME WAS A VACATION
CRUSTY, JUDGEMENTAL OPINIONATED S.O.B. ON BOARD
-YOU ARE A SPIRITUAL BEING ­ ACT THE PART
-RELAX! I FORGIVE YOU.
-BE NICE! I WAS YOU IN A PAST LIFE.
HELP HUMANS ­ THEY NEED IT.
YOU CAN HELP ­ FIGURE IT OUT
IF YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING EFFECTIVE, AT LEAST SYMPATHIZE
WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO IMPROVE THINGS?
BE AN AMERICAN ­ ACT FREE
WELFARE IS NO SUBSTITUTE FOR INTELLIGENCE
REPEAT AFTER ME: I LIKE MYSELF
GET STARTED TODAY!
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE
GET BUSY
IF YOU CAN'T HAVE FUN IN LIFE...

WHERE CAN YOU HAVE FUN?

DON'T I KNOW YOU FROM A PAST LIFETIME?
LIFE IS TOUGH ­ BUT IT BEATS THE ALTERNATIVE!
WHAT ARE YOU PRETENDING NOT TO KNOW?
DON'T BOTHER DOING ANYTHING
YOU CAN'T GO FOR A FREE RIDE

IN AN OLD KARMA

YOU KNOW THE ANSWERS ­

START ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS!

BEING A BODY ISN'T ALL ITS CRACKED UP TO BE
DO LIFE A FAVOR ­ FIND OUT WHO YOU REALLY ARE
OPEN YOUR HEART

OR CLOSE YOUR MOUTH

THE SCHOOL OF HARD KNOCKS

IS A DIPLOMA MILL

JUST BECAUSE YOU LEARNED THAT LESSON THE HARD WAY ­

DOESN'T MEAN ITS TRUE!!!

HURRY UP ­ THE WORLD IS WAITING
IT'S NOT WHAT YOU KNOW ­IT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT!
LIFE IS A BELIEF
BE SIX FEET BEHIND YOUR BRAIN!