Reading through the thread, it seems to me we've got three or four distinct sets of verses which have become tangled one with another due to either similar scansion or association with a common tune. I make out: (a) the church narrative ("the organ pealed potatoes"), (b) the "barefoot boy" story ("it was moonlight on the ocean"), and (c) the "boarding house" story ("At the boarding house I lived in"), with Emily's "sweet day in September" verse probably a fourth.

[Except that I now find the church and boarding-house verses stitched together by one Raymond Crooke. Hmmm.]

At any rate, the one I recognize is the "boarding house" song, because that one pops up in the Irish Rovers' discography as follows (to a tune which is definitely not "Silver Threads Among the Gold"):

MRS. CRANDALL'S BOARDINGHOUSE

Recorded by the Irish Rovers
("Tales to Warm Your Mind", Decca 1973)

In the boarding house I lived in, ev'rything was growing old;
Silver threads among the butter, and the cheese was green with mo-o-old;
When the dog died we had sausages, when the cat died, catnip tea,
When the landlord died, I left there -- spareribs were too much for me....

REFRAIN
Oh, my dear Mrs. Crandall, I think I like you a lot;
I live in your house, quiet as a mouse;
Someday you'll be cau-au-aught....

Well, girls can never change their nature -- it is quite beyond their reach;
Mrs. Crandall is a lemon; she can never be a pea-ea-each;
But the law of compensation is the one I always preach:
You can always squeeze a lemon; have you tried to squeeze a pea-ea-each?

REFRAIN

The train was standing at the station; I was rushing, full of care;
When I tripped on her cat and I stumbled, and fell headlo-ong down the stairs;
Mrs. Crandall came up to me: "Did you miss a step, me son?"
"No," I says, "My dear landlady, I hit ev'ry blooming o-o-one!"

REFRAIN