I have, however, sent a package to Bee Dubya which contains ancient human bones, several pots containing sacred corn pollen, two original Hopi dancer masks, and three live rattlesnakes. The box was packed with the appropriate ceremonies so that he'd be blamed for the appropriation. Enjoy your present!

HINT: If you see a couple of large Mudheads or Koshari stomping around looking for you, fling yourself, groveling, on their mercy. They might be clowns, but they are also disciplinarians.