Today's news that Harry and Meghan are costing the taxpayer £2.4m to refurbish their house, I have reworked my "Maggie's Waddin'" which I wrote in 1960.

Harry's Waddin' (tune: Mairi's Wedding)

Sing a song o tax an woe,
Empty pooches in a row,
Chancellor's collecting dough
A' for Harry's Waddin.

Silk and satin, gold lamé
William wears a lum hat tae,
Ma suit's in the pawn sae what'll Ah dae?
At the Royal Waddin.

Harry's doon oan bendit knee
Nae mair Meghan on TV
Baith as idle as can be
Eftir Harry's Waddin.

Foreign guests fae near an faur
Packed inside St George's ha'
Parasites fae France an a'
At the Royal Waddin.

Whaur dae ye think they'll honeymoon?
Rome, Parree or oan the moon,
Without a doot it's no Dunoon
Eftir sic a Waddin.

Noo they're mairrit aff they blow
Tae spend a thoosan' poon or so
That's the way oor money goes
Tae pey for Harry's Waddin .

Back again an help ma Boab,
Nane o them has goat a job,
Wha will buy the Christening robe?
You and me ah'll bet ye!

Royal mince is awfy dear
Harry needs a rise next year.
Increase tax on fags and beer,
Eftir Harry's Waddin.

Sing a song o tax an woe,
Empty pooches in a row,
Chancellor's collecting dough
A' for Harry's Waddin.