The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #1199   Message #4010480
Posted By: Lighter
25-Sep-19 - 01:26 PM
Thread Name: DTStudy: Seven Old Ladies
Subject: RE: DTStudy: Seven Old Ladies
Eric Jackson,"Petrol in My Blood "(Lulu.com: 2012):

“I said [to Liberace], ‘I bet that you’ve never been asked to play 'Three Old Ladies Locked in a Lavatory.’ He looked a little taken aback and said he’d never heard of it. ‘In a lavat’ry?’ he asked. I sang the words to him and he fell about laughing.

        Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
       Three old ladies are locked in the lavatory
       They were there from Monday to Saturday.
       Nobody knew they were there.

        They promised to go and have tea with the vicar
        They went in together, they thought it was quicker,
        The lock on the door was a bit of a sticker
        The vicar had tea on his own.

      CHORUS

       The first old lady her name was Miss Porter
       She was the Bishop of Chichester’s daughter,
       She went in to get rid of superfluous water
       From drinking two bottles of gin.

    CHORUS
              
       The second old lady her name was Miss Wender
       She went in to adjust her suspender
       She got it caught up in her feminine gender        
       And that was an awkward affair.

    CHORUS

         The third old lady, her name was Miss Pumfrey        
         She tried very hard to get her bum free
         She said, ‘Leave me here, it’s so cosy and comfy
         The vicar had tea on his own.

    CHORUS "