The Norwegian expression for weak tea is “danserinatiss” — ballerina’s pee. This never fails to make me snicker.

I drink smoked tea, Lap-sang sou chong. I’m told that Chinese people make it for foreigners who had their tastebuds shot off in the war and never really liked tea anyway, but I just love the stuff. It is the flavour of my father’s tea, selected when I was about 10 and my family moved from the country, where we had our own well, to the city, where the water came from the river and stank of chlorine. On the one hand, no fear of typhoid, but on the other, your Earl Grey was a little too much like swimming pool.

I put milk in it, and sweetener. I drink it out of a large beer mug. So sue me.