I meant to hit the preview button so to continue.

What is society trying to achieve by punishment? It is elements of all the above, depending on circumstances. It is unfortunate that the families become collaterally damaged, but the criminal had free choice with his/her actions. People lose employment due ti drunk driving charges that inmpacts families, not being an achiever impacts earnings and this also reflects on the family.
Life is not an even playing field and never will be. There is no point in trying to pretend that it is. Think how much worse life would be under Sharia Law.