When I saw the polar ice cap melt I did't care
because I'm not a polar bear
When I saw the Amazon Forest burn I didn't care
because I'm not a tropical tree
When I saw Australia burn I didn't care
because I'm not a Kangaroo
When I saw gas regulations recinded I rejoiced
because I am a Republican heavily invested in oil
When food and water became scarce I didn't care
because I had invested in oil.