The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #167206   Message #4029960
Posted By: Helen
24-Jan-20 - 02:17 PM
Thread Name: BS: that powerless feeling (sensitive topic)
Subject: RE: BS: that powerless feeling (sensitive topic)
Is heart-on-sleeve a bad thing? :-D

A few years ago I drove home from work and turned the corner into my street to see a large number of ambulances and police cars. A young high school woman had committed suicide. Even now the people who knew her ask themselves how they could have helped her, how they could have recognised her situation, whether they could have changed the outcome in a positive way, etc, etc. I'll remember that day very vividly for the rest of my life, even though I had only met her a few times.

As I turned the corner, I was listening to my car stereo with a Vin Garbutt song playing. The chorus of the song had the young woman's name in it. I didn't realise that until after I found out the reason for the emergency vehicles.

The problem with empathy, wearing our hearts on our sleeves, can be knowing when to disconnect and protect our own well being. We can still care, we can still show empathy and try to look out for other people, but we will be no use if we are a mess ourselves.

In Australia, there is a project called RU OK aimed at being aware of other people around us who may be not feeling OK or may even be considering suicide.

Senoufou, in the last 18 months three of our old cats have passed. It is never easy, and some people don't understand how upsetting it is to lose a close companion just because it is an animal and not a human, but cats and dogs show unconditional love if they are treated well. That's a valuable experience in life.