Imperial Torturer, please set free those who have been longest in Our dungeons. That is, those who have been there for over seventy-five years. You may dispose of them as you see fit. Also, please give each remaining prisoner a 100 milliliters of cold, fresh water. Should these examples of Our mercy and generosity cause outbreaks of restiveness among those under your care you have Our permission to use the fire hoses and rubber truncheons.

We thank every one of Our loyal subjects for their good wishes and it is Our Imperial promise to reduce the tax rate by one per centum two years after fire is replaced by renewable energy in this, Our Empire.

We extend Our thanks to the Imperial Ignoramus for his presents of gold, frankincese, and myrrh.


Emperor Rapparee, Imperious Rex       ®       His Mark