Posted this on another thread but it might make more sense here.

ON YOUR BIKE
(AGAIN)

The Norman Tebbit special
was still in the Bike Shed,
so I went back to work in England
just like Boris said.

I pedalled fast and furious
down roads all marked South,
maintaining social distancing
hardly opening my mouth.

I reached the Sawmill in Manchester
but never got past the door.
They said that I'd been sacked
over forty years before.

My mood darkened further,
I found my tyres were flat.
The bosses shouted, "Stay Alert,
you stupid Scottish twat."

SHUG HANLAN