In 1997, Stratford Ontario took first place in its category in the Nations In Bloom "Prettiest Town" competition -- we're still patting ourselves on the back over that -- but the contest I want to see is "England's Maddest Village".

Actually, Stratford can be fairly mad sometimes, for Canada. We usually keep it to ourselves during the summer, when the tourists are about, but we let our freak flag fly once the snow comes and we have the place to ourselves.

But I doubt our chances in competition with any representative dorp in the UK.