It goes something like this:


I'll tell you a story that happened to me
One day as I ... by the sea
For the sun it was up ...
...
I went into a bar, and I ordered a stout
I'm sorry said the barman all the beer is sold out
Buy whiskey ...
... I've heard that it's good

CHORUS: Oh never oh never oh never no more
If I live to be a hundred a hundred and four
I can't go to heaven they won't let me up
Till I bring him a bottle of Johnny Jump up.
Oh never oh never oh never again
If I live to be a hundred a hundred and ten
...


Or something like this.

There's a lot of verses, and it's about a man who drinks too much cider and ends his life on it.