THE BALLAD OF TONY AND BRONNIE by John Warner, tune Frankie & Johnny

Tony and Bronnie were pollies in for a glittering time,
Tony made Bronnie the speaker of the house she was his partner in crime,
Hear that Tony say,”Bronnie’s done no wrong”.

When Tony made Bronnie the speaker,
Out went impartiality,
’Cause Bronnie left the coalition in their seats
And flang out all the ALP

She weren’t no man
But, hey, she done them wrong!

Now Bronnie, she knew all the rule book,
She knew how to draw and to shoot,
But every time she drew number forty four,
She’d shoot Tony A in the foot,

And Tony says,
“What did I do wrong?”

Bronnie’s front page on the Tele,
That’s quite amazing to see,
’Cause the big front page of the Daily Telegraph
Is reserved for the ALP,

Still that Tony says
“Bronnie’s done no wrong”.

Bronnie spends thousands on travel,
Taxpayers’ loot down the drain,
Nick Xenophon will use his new skateboard,
Malcolm Turnbull will take the train

Still Tony says,
“Bronnie’s done no wrong”.

Bronnie likes lipstick and diamonds,
And costumes in stripes white and black,
But whoever her embalmer was,
She should have given him the sack,

He was just a man
And he done her wrong.

Has Tony been onto the Tele,
Had a word in the editor’s ear?
“Put Bronnie up on your big front page,
So I can make her disappear”.

Still Tony says
“Bronnie’s done no wrong”.

Well, Bronnie resigned like she oughter,
It was high time that she had to go,
Next episode in the Daily Telegraph,
The ballad of Tony and Joe,

Two sleazy men,
Who haven’t done no wrong.

Finale tune – Bonnie & Clyde

Tony and Joe were liberal politicians,
And devious magicians with the people’s money
Wouldn’t it be fun, to blow away their cover
And suddenly discover that they lied ?


Yeah! And John Warner had nuffin’ to do wiv der writin’ of dis, OK?